Just A Little More Thanksgiving

I drove into my hometown a little before 10 pm last night. I slept over 9 hours last night and enjoyed every minute of it (except for the weird dreams, but whatever). Thanksgiving Austin Style was great. My sister Jenna was an awesome hostess and Austin, though warm and muggy, was a great place to be. The trees were fantastic! The Target's were in abundance! The malls were glorious! The food was fantabulous! My sister's mashed potatoes rocked the house and the garlicky fresh green beans were super garlicky (aka awesome, because I love me some garlic).

Before leaving Austin we stopped at Phil's for some late lunch nourishment before the long drive home. My parents had corndogs and I had the mini-burger basket. That was some good eating! Their baskets come with mixed fries, both regular and sweet potato. I LOVE sweet potato fries. So very very very good. Top that off with some Amy's ice cream (an Austin original) and we headed north. We made one last Target stop in the Dallas metroplex (and I also got some Chick-fil-a, awesome!) before making across the Oklahoma Texas border into God's country. When we stepped out of the car, mom commented, "You know this is God's country because the temperature is cool." She may or may not have had a big problem with the muggy weather in Austin. And she may or may not have packed for slightly cooler temperatures. Long range forecasts can be misleading. I'm just sayin'.

I've come back home to piles of laundry and a to-do list that I just can't quite get around to yet. I'd like to go see a movie, but I don't think that's going to happen. I've got to get music ready for church tomorrow (I haven't sung in weeks, between Thanksgiving and the horrible cold of November 2008) and we have a family Christmas event next weekend to prepare for, so I better be going now.

I hope all your Thanksgiving's were wonderful!
Thankful list: Saturday edition:
1. Sleeping in your own bed: There is nothing better.
2. Sleeping well past 9 am. Especially after 3 nights in a row of less than 6 hours of sleep.
3. Warm fluffy robes. 'Nuff said.
4. Chilly mornings that signal that winter is just around the corner. Please let it snow more this year, God!
5. Getting back to a regular routine.

Oh My, Black Friday

I've been up since 5 am. I should preface that. I didn't get to bed until after 11, didn't fall asleep until well after midnight, woke up at 3 and got up at 5. All for some doorbuster deals and promise of Target joy (we don't have a Target in my hometown. sigh). It's 11 am and I am beat. It's time for a nap.

You really have to strategize to get to the right sales at the right time. Some special deals must be sacrificed in order to get something a little higher up on the list. Mom found a special gift for my dad, so we are glad we made Target our first stop, but we missed out on some good buys at JC Penneys. My family dropped me off at my sisters apartment while they went furniture shopping with my sister. I couldn't take any more, people! I'll regroup and go out to the mall in a little while with my mom and sister later.

I love all the christmas decorations now that Thanksgiving is over. Don't get me wrong. I LOVE Christmas and the decorations are so much fun. But I don't like Thanksgiving getting crowded out by Christmas. There is a time for every season, and every holiday. So today I drank it all in like a hot fresh perk-me-up latte from Starbucks, reveling in the red, green and gold, humming to Stevie Wonder's What Christmas Means to Me and feeling good about chipping away at the Christmas gift buying list (and getting a few things for me *grin*).

Being that we are in Austin, my dad had to have breakfast at his favorite place, Austin Diner. He loves an old-fashioned diner breakfast with fried eggs and biscuits and gravy and they have some of the best. I am picky about my biscuits and gravy so I know. Maybe I'll have chick-fil-a later. Isn't it funny how you have to enjoy all the out of the ordinary favorites when you are out of town. It's just the way it goes, I guess.

It would be nice to stay longer but we are heading home this afternoon. I am going to make a prediction. Lord willing, I will sleep until noon tomorrow!

Thankful List Friday Edition:
1. Changing Seasons: I love them all. Fall may be my favorite, and in Austin the leaves are still turning and it is fabulous. I also thank the One who made the seasons. He had a great idea with Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter.
2. Comfy jeans: Perfect for Black Friday shopping.
3. Drizzly Rainy Days: Also a favorite. I love the rain, I love the clouds, I love the moodiness. Even when it comes with humidity.
4. Peace and Quiet. Me, God, My computer, iTunes. All by myself. God knows when I need to recharge.
5. Warm comfy pj's. The ones I bought today will be put to good use. I cannot wait.
6. Prayers and the answers to them. Even when they come slower than I would like.
7. Hope: Even delayed is still hope.
8. Going home. Be it ever so humble, there is no place like home.

See you soon Juno and Phoebe!

Happy Thanksgiving (and a Thankful List)

I need to remember not to hit enter, because, you know, it goes on and publishes my not quite finished post.

Here is my thankful list, Thanksgiving edition.

1. Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. It's a tradition, it's fun and, as I mentioned before, I love a high school marching band.
2. Starbucks. Caffeine is nice after not much sleep.
3. Thanksgiving Dinner. Turkey, Dressing, Sweet potatoes, Mashed Potatoes, Green Beans, and a spectacular dessert. I.CANNOT.WAIT.
4. Family to spend Thanksgiving with. I've already expressed thankfulness for my family, but it's even better to be with them. All four of us together. With my sister in Austin, it doesn't happen often.
5. H.E.B. Love that grocery store. And I loved that it had pumpkin pie tarts. Not that I ate them for breakfast or anything, or that I ate them with Macaroni and Cheese crackers either. Just sayin'.
6. Cranberries. They deserve there own individual listing.
7. iPod. There is no way I could have made it through a 6 hour drive (including a traffic jam for the bigger part of it) without some wonderful music to enjoy.
8. Andy Williams. It's the most wonderful time of the year, ya'll.
9. My dad's mad driving skillz. Because I don't think I could have made it through that traffic jam with my senses intact.
10. Tylenol Rapid Release Gels. For headaches brought on by traffic jams, low blood sugar, and sleeping in a weird bed on weird pillows.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!!!!

I am sitting here in my sister's apartment, watching Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, contemplating taking a shower at some point, while my sister snaps green beans. It's a Thanksgiving, Austin style. We are in t-shirts and shorts because the temp is hovering somewehere around 80. My sister wants me to mention her cat Lelu on the old blog, so to appease, LELU LELU LELU. She's a pretty cool cat actually. A rescue from the shelter, she has a coat of shiny black with a white tummy and paws. She has the softest shiniest coat I've ever seen. Just don't tell Juno.

Jen woke us up with sugar free soy cinnamon dolce latte's at 8 am this morning. Not that I wasn't, you know, thankful, for the Starbucks offering, but we didn't reach Austin until after midnight last night. I was not quite ready to join the day, but my sister is a morning person.

Things I'm learning from the parade: I'm not sure I like Darius Rucker as a country singer (oh, Hootie, you were such a staple of my 90's life), but he does have a nice voice. My sister and I don't get the Stewie Family Guy big deal, and have marveled at yet another ridiculous boy band, Varsity Fan Club (my sister said they looked more like they could be beat up by the Varsity Football team). The special needs flag corp was so sweet and I am completely over Miley, Selena, and so on and so on. But I still love a high school marching band.

So I missed getting a thanksgiving thankful list yesterday, so I need to double up today, right?

Thanksgiving:Tuesday

Since being sick, I've slacked off quite a bit in prayer and studying the Bible. Not a good excuse really, but I have. Instead of getting up earlier, I've been hitting the snooze button a few extra times. This morning I hit the snooze one time less and made myself get up. I didn't really feel like it, but I opened up my daily bible and read Daniel 1, a portion of Psalm 119 and 1 Peter 3. What wonderful scriptures. I was again inspired by Daniel's integrity and God's favor on him. A hunger stirred up in me as I read Psalm 119, the devotion and passion that the Psalmist had for the word causes my own lackluster passion to grow. And then Peter's admonition to endure sufferings caused me conviction as I consider how easily I pout and complain when difficult times come my way. I was revived, challenged, encouraged by this time in the Word today.

I was instantly reminded of something a Sunday school teacher once said to me, "You can be back on top with God again in a day." What he meant was, with God, once you turn back to Him, He is right there, ready to embrace you, and it's as if you never strayed. Oh the mercy of God. So my thanksgiving list today is inspired by my sweet time with the Lord this morning.

1.Jesus. Shouldn't he have started my list this week? I would be nothing without my Savior, Friend, Soon-coming Bridegroom and Mediator.

2.Salvation. I am thankful that I was raised in a Christian home, a godly word-filled church and that Mrs. Beavers invited us to receive Jesus in my kindergarten class. I was baptized soon after and as I've grown up I am forever thankful that God saved me at a young age. Knowing my tendency to wander, I am thankful that a childlike faith and His enormous grace secured my eternal destiny when I was not quite 6 years old.

3.The Word. My daily bread that always satisfies, a deep well which I have yet to plumb the depths of, and a source of encouragement, life, hope, guidance and direction the likes of which no one has ever come close to matching. I love that there is still so much more to learn, even though I've been reading and learning and studying for over twenty years. And if I live to be a hundred I know I'll never get it all figured out, but I am encouraged to keep searching, keep studying, keep meditating on His amazing Word. I love how so many different writers from all walks of life were chosen by God to pen His story for us. I love the language and poetry and detail and beauty and real-life practical application I can find in one place.

4.Heaven. My home. I don't meditate on it much, but when I do, I am in awe that eternal communion with God in a place with no more pain or tears was in God's perfect plan for a fallen people, that Jesus has gone there to prepare a place for me and that many who I have lost in death are there right now and we will all be reunited one day. I can only imagine the splendor, the beauty and the awe of being in God's continual presence in a place too amazing for Paul to even detail.

5. My Heavenly Father. Elohim. Yahweh. Jehovah. All-sufficient, Omnipotent, Omnipresent, Omniscient. The God who is Love. Who loves that he is gracious, compassionate and just. The one who breathed stars and has my name etched in his hand and created all things. And He knows me. Hears me. Loves me.

Thanksgiving: Monday

Keith and Cheeto came by to see us at work today. I've been blessed to get to know him. Such a nice man, content with life, happy for a companion to tag along, not encumbered by things that the rest of us get so tied down by. A couple of weeks ago while walking back to his tent a couple of teenagers mugged him. Mugged a homeless man. Hit him in the face and took what little money he had. He told me he was saving up to get a place of his own. Some cynics might think he made that up just to get money, but he's never asked me or anyone else I know of for a dime. He talked today about fighting in Vietnam, he told us he lost a lot of friends. He proudly named off his infantry division but like many Vietnam vets there was that darkness in his eyes as he recalled those days.

Knowing Keith has made me aware of so many things I neglect, so many things I take for granted. So today's thanksgiving list is dedicated to him. And Cheeto.

1.Shelter. I take this for granted but I have a great place, with a comfy bed and egyptian cotton sheets and fluffy pillows. I am warm in the winter and cool in the summer just at the flip of a switch.
2.Phoebe and Juno. I love my pets! So sweet and cuddly and always there.
3.Food. Actually I have too much of it. How many times have I looked into an overflowing pantry, stuffed refigerator and freezer and thought I had nothing to eat, because nothing sounded good. I never have to go hungry. Maybe it would be good if I did once in a while.
4. Running water. Honestly, one of the things I am truly grateful for, but take for granted the most. How many long (too long) hot showers have I taken in my day? How about flushing the toilet and brushing my teeth and washing dishes. Not to mention access to clean water, which I know is a luxury in other parts of the world.
5. Citizenship in a free country. Free to worship in the way I choose, free to express myself, free to vote and write this blog. I know my citizenship is in heaven, but how blessed are we to get to walk this sod as a citizen of a great country like the U.S.A.

What Part of Thanksgiving Dinner are You?

You Are The Stuffing

You're complicated and complex, yet all your pieces fit together. People miss you if you're gone - but they're not sure why.

What Part of Thanksgiving Are You?

Music to Travel By

This post was inspired by Kat's post over at Bloggable Music Network. I will be on the road this week heading to Austin to spend Thanksgiving with my sister and parents and you better believe I have a playlist in the works.

My family has taken our share of long road trips. There was the long drive to California when I was 10, the long drive to Florida to see my cousin graduate back in 2000, the multiple trips to Eureka Springs when I was a kid. The Colorado family reunion. The quick trip with my dad and sister to Chicago (and a story I'll never tell goes with that one). We never flew anywhere, my dad always drove. And as soon as I got my hands on a walkman (and later the beloved iPod) I had my own music to listen to and enjoy. Over and over and over again. Here are some of my all-time favorites.

1) U2 The Joshua Tree My dad is an avid country music fan. I am not. Enter the walkman circa 1992. That forever long drive to Pueblo Colorado was blessed by Bono, The Edge, Larry and Adam. And what a beautiful album to complement the rugged West Texas, Northern New Mexico and Southern Colorado landscape. I cannot listen to it today without remembering that road trip.

2)The Normals Coming to Life A month after I graduated from college my grandfather became very ill and my grandmother told my mom she didn't expect him to live very long. So we packed up the suburban and headed west to Amarillo. The month before I was reading CCM and Derek Webb picked Coming to Life as one of his favorite cd's of 2000. I figured if Derek liked it I would too. This was my first taste of Andrew Osenga and I have loved him ever since. The moodiness of that cd worked well with the somber atmosphere of going to visit my grandfather one last time before he died.

3)Third Day Time and Southern Tracks/Bebo Norman 10,000 Days Longer trips usually mean I will listen to more than one cd. Case in point, the two day drive to Ft. Myers, Florida when my cousin graduated from high school. I thought a little southern flavor ala Third Day would be nice for such a southern road trip. And since 2000 also marked the year that I was a wee bit infatuated with Bebo Norman, I could not leave him out.

4)Kara's Thanksgiving Road trip 2008 playlist For my trip to Austin this year I've chosen to be a little more eclectic than trips past. So I am including Andrew Osenga's Swing Wide the Glimmering Gates, JJ Heller's Grow, Small, most of Painted Red, a little Amos Lee, Jack Johnson, Coldplay, Sara Groves, Andrew Peterson, Brandon Heath and because it's Thanksgiving, The Cranberries.

Thanksgiving

I've made no small talk about that fact that I am prone to complaining. One of the main reasons I didn't blog much last week was because all I could think to blog about was how sick I was and how I was sick of being sick. That kinda thing can get old. Fast. I'm all for being open and honest (well, more so in writing than in person, I'm extroverted in writing, introverted in person), but sometimes my rants can take it too far. I don't want this to be a place I come and vent. Even about a cold.

This week is Thanksgiving. And while I'll be spending my Thanksgiving in Austin with my sister and parents, giving thanks for all God's blessings and stuffing myself with turkey, dressing and Whole Foods awesome carrot cake, I want to take some time every day this week to make mention of the things for which I am thankful. Little things, ordinary things, big things, obvious things, super spectacular things. And a little bit of the "bless the Lord oh my soul and forget not all his benefits..."

So here is the start of my list:
1. This blog. I am thankful that I have a place to come and write and share my heart. I have been blessed by every person who has read this blog and takes the time to comment. I've "met" some really wonderful people who have encouraged me, made me think, laugh and wonder.
2. My health. Nothing like being sick to make you thankful that you have your health. I have friends and family suffering from diabetes, cancer, pneumonia, kidney failure, congestive heart failure and seriously ill children. So I don't want to take for granted that I am alive and well today. Aside from an ear infection. And that is so small in comparison.
3. My parents. I should talk about them more here because they are awesome. My dad has always taken great care of his family, my mom is the best friend, supporter and encourager any child could ask for. I don't know what I would do without them.
4. My sister. We are 16 mos apart in age, but about as different as we could be. But she makes me laugh and our quirky sides totally mesh well together. And she remembers awesome movie quotes that I can never remember.
5. My job. I've had the privilege of working in a Christian environment for over nine years now. In this uncertain economy having work is blessing enough, but I get to work with people I enjoy, a job I'm actually pretty good at, and have the opportunity to be encouraged and encourage other's in the Lord without it interfering with office policy.

That's just the beginning. And who knows, maybe I'll carry this on year round. It would be good for me to remember thanksgiving is more than just a November holiday.

Weddings and Such

First things first. I'm alive! I still have a little bit of a scratchy throat and my ears are still stopped up but other than that, all is well. I made it back to work on Thursday, but I missed just about every other obligation I had this week. And I've had my fill of Little House on the Prairie and The Walton's. Oh, who am I kidding, I'll never have my fill of Little House. Love that show.

Today I went to the wedding of a friend from work. She is ten years my junior and that makes me feel so old and so single. I've watched this relationship from it's infancy and I was very excited to see them tie the knot. Everything about the wedding from the music to the dresses and all the bling (my friend Julie is nicknamed Julz for a reason, she loves to sparkle!) was completely Julie. My only regret is not getting a second rollup from the buffet. Oh well.

I love a wedding. And I was truly happy for the couple. But somewhere between the I do and the first dance that little tinge of sadness/jealousy/impatience/loneliness crept up. I wonder when it will be my turn. I don't talk about my singleness much here but it is something I think about. A lot.

I always thought I would get married in my early or mid-twenties. My mom got married at twenty so it just seemed like I would too. Sadly my dreams for this probably came across as desperation in college. My poor boyfriends. They were ready to bolt before they could ask me out for a second date. When I moved back to my hometown I felt sure that God would find a way to bring me a husband. I remember this one lady at church who used to pray for my husband to show up. It was sweet at first. But then she insisted on praying every Sunday. More than a few times she had to chase me down the hall after services. Maybe I shouldn't have run.

Then came grad school. Then came the year that all my closest hometown friends got engaged or married. The three girls I thought would stay single with me for the long haul. One by one I watched them wed. Part of me was so happy. And like today part of me dealt with that sad/jealous/impatient/lonely side.

I'm not one of those people who thinks they won't ever get married. I really believe I will. Maybe that's why it's so hard to see another year pass without it actually happening. You begin to feel like everybody else is passing you by in the business of life.

It's really not as melodramatic as it sounds. I've done better since getting into my thirties. I've kind of settled into this stage of my life. I still won't go so far as to call singleness a gift, but I don't consider it a burden to bear either. Sometimes I'm really glad that I don't have to worry about anyone else. Other times I would give anything to have a husband to cook for and snuggle up to on the couch.

It is a hope deferred, but I dare say it's not a hope that is completely hopeless. So I don't give into the sad/jealous/impatient/lonely feelings for too long.

One day.

Father and Daughter

Being sick always brings out the worst in me. Isn't it strange that I can't focus one iota on anything of measurable value, but my selfish, rude, unfriendly side has been fine tuned just so when I don't feel well. I guess it's to be expected. When you feel bad, you behave badly? That's how it is these last few days.

Basically, I'm sick of being sick. I know, I sound whiny. In fact, right now I can bring to mind so many who are having it worse off than me. In the words of one of my wonderful co-workers, "It isn't cancer". I shouldn't complain. Colds turn me all pathetic.

I left work early today. I hate doing that. I have so much I need to be doing there, but the only thing I really wanted was a bed and a warm blanket. After my boss's urging (more like,"go home so you don't make the rest of us sick") I headed to Walgreens to stock up on kleenex, halls cough drops and more cold medicine and went home.

After some napping that was interrupted by a coughing fit I decided to get on here and check out some blogs. I would do Monday Manna, but there is nothing in me right now to make anything spiritual sounding come out. I've read several thought provoking posts and every time I try to leave a deep or at least coherent sounding comment, I come up short. So I do the Pandora radio thing (thanks for reminding me about that Kat, I'm always stuck on iTunes but this is a nice change of pace).

In my Steven Delolpoulos station a Paul Simon song started playing. I love Paul Simon. Graceland is stinkin' awesome. And right in the middle of the chorus to the song Father and Daughter it was like God had a special message just for me:

"There could never be a father love his daughter more than I love you"

On my rotten, self-pitying day, God had a word for his beloved. And did I ever need to hear it. On the day (after quite a few) when everything seems lousy and I don't feel spiritual to be told I am wholly loved by the Creator of all things, loved in such a way that no other love could compare or come close, that I am loved not based on my behavior, my attitude or what I have done or don't do is immeasurable.

Grace in a Paul Simon song.

May you hear God singing over you today too.

We are immeasurably, unfailingly, devotedly, incomparably loved!!!

Things I Got at the Fair...

1) 2 cute red signs
2) Tater Twirl!
3) Sparkly top for the holiday season
4) Flu Shot (Yep. Flu shot, well FluMist)
5) Cinnamon Almonds
6) Fried Pie from the Amish (bonus was seeing the cute little Amish boy with his old-timey haircut and suspenders, precious!)
7) Pecan Pie Muffin Mix from Homemade Gourmet (I love those muffins!)

I was going to make a second trip this evening, but I am beat. The cold is still taking it's toll on me and I wanted nothing more than to curl up on the couch with my dog and kitten and watch Little House on the Prairie. So I did.

My tater twirl did not disappoint! It was fantastic as always. I tried to share some with my pastor's wife, but she is so disciplined. Oh well. I also had a fried cheese on a stick, of which she also did not partake.

They were giving away free flu shots at the Arts and Crafts fair this year. Flu shots are neither artsy nor crafty. I was with my mom and we were not going to get our shots but then a lady who used to work with me stopped me and asked (read: dragged) me to go on in. I protested because I didn't know if having a cold would effect the shot. They said if I hadn't had a fever I should be okay. So I did it. Actually I did the mist, my first time to try that. Definitely better than a shot! After we came out my pastor's wife told me that she has heard of several people getting sick after getting the flu shot this year. Say what? Info that might have been useful say, five minutes earlier (Don't worry, she didn't watch us go in and then wait to tell us. Because that would just have been cruel). Surely this is a coincidence, because after this cold I really don't want to get the flu.

I'm going to get to bed a little earlier tonight. I have to work tomorrow and tomorrow night I'm going to see a friend's daughter in the title role of The Diary of Anne Frank. Joy is an amazingly gifted and beautiful girl who not only brings home great grades, she also plays basketball, sings, acts and is on student council. If I was fifteen, I would so be jealous of her. Oh, who am I kidding, at 31 I'm still jealous of her. I know she will be fantastic.

Here's hoping (and praying) this cold will just die already. No one wants to sit in a theater next to a girl who is coughing up a lung and sneezing during one of Anne's poignant monologues.

Blessings and good night!

More Precious Than Gold..

For those of you who are on pins and needles waiting for an update on Kara's cold November 2008 version, here you go: I'm still sick. I am going to work today, but only because I work in an office by myself and no one really has to be around me to get their job done (unless of course they need computer assistance, in which case, they should come bearing lysol disenfectant spray and a mask). I do, however, feel better than I did yesterday at this time. I really think the Zicam (and the prayers!) are working.

I was reading from Psalm 19 today during my quiet time. I always read from the NIV but when I was done today I wanted to see what it read like in the Message. I was reading along, enjoying a fresh perspective on a passage I had read countless times in my more familiar version when this part stuck out to me:

11-14 There's more: God's Word warns us of danger
and directs us to hidden treasure.
Otherwise how will we find our way?
Or know when we play the fool?
Clean the slate, God, so we can start the day fresh!
Keep me from stupid sins,
from thinking I can take over your work;
Then I can start this day sun-washed,
scrubbed clean of the grime of sin.
These are the words in my mouth;
these are what I chew on and pray." (emphasis all mine)

Of course I loved "Keep me from stupid sins", but I was humbled by the next line, "from thinking I can take over your work". Uhuh. You could say I am convicted. It's a stupid sin to think I can do God's job better than Him. Or that I can do it at all. But how many times have I tried? How many times have I put myself in the position of being His counselor/advisor/chief of staff? Oh you do not want to know the answer. Let's just say that control-freak and me are pretty much synonymous.

The beautiful theme of Psalm 19 is how exceedingly awesome God's works and His word are. Like the psalmist, when I meditate on the glory of God as seen in the heavens and on His word that is perfect, trustworthy, right, radiant, pure, sure and altogether righteous, how can I ever consider myself able to take over His work. He breathed the stars! He spoke and things appeared! He imagined the universe and the human body and seasons that mark the passing of time. He inpsired His entire word to be written over a span a 1400 years to over 40 different people transcribing it. He ensured it's survival throughout the ages that I may meditate on it today. So that I too may be kept from stupid sins.

"May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart, be pleasing in your sight O Lord my rock and my redeemer."

I'm Pretty Much Just Like All The Other Crybabies

Yep. I'm sick. Even the Tylenol cold stuff that was supposed to help me sleep through the night didn't keep my sore throat at bay, which in turn, kept me awake. So I a debating going to the doctor to see if it's just a cold or perhaps the very scary strep throat that has been going around (read: hypochondriac). I know I was coughing last night, so I'm sure it isn't strep, but this morning it's mainly about the throat. Oh, who am I kidding, it's just a cold. A miserable, miserable cold. This is my least favorite thing about fall. These stinkin' colds. THEY. GET. ME. EVERY. TIME.

No singing for me tonight. Hopefully, I won't miss the arts and crafts fair this weekend, because then I will really, really be sad. I can't miss the Tater Twirl!

You must all pray.

For my priorities and my cold.

La, la, la, la, la, la Tonight

Ahhh, my favorite lyrics from New Kids on the Block. I vividly remember singing them one time at the top of my lungs while riding in those old timey cars at Six Flags. I was excited because I was going to be seeing NKOTB, lalalalalala that night. Oh to be 13 in the early 1990s.

What should I tell you about tonight? Let's see. I'm getting a cold. My throat is sore and I am starting to cough. I've been having allergy and sinus problems (hassles really) for a month, but this is defnitely the beginning of a cold. I need to get some Zicam and a good night's rest. Maybe some echinecea and vitamin c would be good too. Apparently my dad is coming down with a cold too. He and I both seem to get the same upper respiratory like infections. My mom obviously has the sinuses and lungs of a healthy horse, because she never get's sick. Jenna doesn't seem to get as sick now that she lives in Austin. Should I move? Nahhh.

This weekend is our town's arts and crafts fair. A friend of mine has these wonderful wooden signs with scriptures on them in her booth that I just love. My mom once had her make a one of a kind bench for me for my birthday. All she told her was she wanted it red and to pray about what she thought she should paint on the bench. She painted a bucket of daisies (my favorite flower), a bear sitting next to the daisies (I've collected teddy bears since childhood, because I'm cool like that) and the scripture was one of my favorites: Isaiah 40:31. Pretty cool, huh? No one told her any of those things about me. That was one of the best gifts I've ever received.

Like most fairs, I love this one for the food. I love to get my annual tater twirl. For those who don't have as discriminating of tastes as mine, a tater twirl is a big ol' potato that they slice into this twirls (hence the name) and fry up. Its like potato chips all connected together and it's hot and crispy and fried and yummy, and in no way healthy or good for you. And sometimes I also have a corndog (what's a trip to the fair without a corndog, people?). One year they had all things battered and deep fried, oreos, twinkies, snickers, reeces, etc. I tried the oreos. I don't recommend eating those lovely cookies that way. Battered and deep fried has it's limits. This year I am off work on the Friday of the fair so I will go out early, but I will probably go back in the evening with my co-workers. It's a tradition. And an opportunity to get another Tater Twirl. Just sayin.

My boss got me a new printer/copier for my desk. Which means I had to clean off my desk. Not a fun week at work for me, but at least now I can scan and print to my little heart's content. I am trying to be a little more organized on the job. I realize that organization is a gift I've kinda misplaced (I think it might be under some invoices though).

Confession time. I have downloaded a ridiculous amount of songs that I have heard on commercials. JC Penney's and Apple get me most of the time. Don't tell me that some of the little indie darlings that they find to sing over their commercials for hoodies and American Living don't get you too (I totally, and unashamedly became a fan of the Weepies thanks to last year's JC Penney's commercial. If that makes me not cool, well, so be it.) So while watching TLC this weekend I kept seeing this commercial for Jon and Kate plus 8 and the song kept registering on my must-have-o-meter. I spent a couple of hours (well maybe not that long, perhaps it just felt like it) searching for the song before I discovered the artist is Fisher and the song is Beautiful Life. Crank up your iTunes search engine and tell me that catchy tune doesn't grab your ear. It's adorable like a Gosselin sextuplet.

Speaking of itunes and music, I plan to download this album on payday(new confession: payday is also download a new album from itunes day, spread the word). I love Jack Johnson. I love Christmas music. So it's a win win win.

I was reading a entertainment gossipy scoopy type article on EW.com yesterday that has me a little perplexed. You see my darling, favorite of all time favorite shows LOST is coming back in January. Yay!!!! But apparently, it's coming back in Pushing Daisies timeslot. Boooo. Which means Pushing Daisies may be pushing up daisies before too long. Now don't get me wrong. If I have to choose I would unregrettably let Pushing Daisies die in order to enjoy my beloved LOST. But does it have to be an either or thing ABC? Answer me that.

Okay, the sinus pressure is building. I'll take 2 Tylenol Sinus and see you in the morning.

Blessings.

So, um, Don't Even THINK About Calling Me at 8:00 pm on January 21st

'Cause I'll be watching this.

Less than 3 months, less than 3 months!!!!! I. CANNOT. WAIT.

Soles for Souls

I love shoes. My favorites are of the summer sandal variety, but really, shoes are something of a passion. This summer I managed to go on a marathon shoe shopping spree and buy 8 pair in one outing. When think about it now it's pretty embarassing. Probably because I had thirty pair or more sitting in a huge box in my closet, and that I really didn't need three more pairs of red sandals, but whatever. When I think about the shoe extravagance dwelling in my closet in comparison to those who have never even worn shoes, I am humbled. Compelled to do something. Read on...

When Anne at Flowerdust mentioned she had a supersecret mission challenge for some fellow bloggers I was equal parts intrigued and terrified. What would she be asking us to do? I don't like to commit to something unknown, I don't like to cast my net without knowing what I'm in for. Call me cautious, even freakishly so. However, this isn't the kind of faith life I am called to. I've shared here about wanting to do more, about showing compassion. One of my posts was written just a day before Anne made the announcement on her blog. Sensing this was a holy nudge, I went for it. Signed right up.

I'm so glad I did.

Today is the launch of 50000shoes.com and we have a mission challenge to raise money for 50,000 pairs of shoes in 50 days. Go to the site and with a couple of clicks and just a few minutes of your time you can donate money for shoes for those in need. $5 gets two pairs of shoes! People, that's a latte! A small one at that. It's not even the cost of a fast food lunch. I'm doing it. You can too! It's so easy. Just go here

Here's a little snippet from the press release Anne sent me:"It is estimated that Americans have 1.5 billion pairs of unworn shoes lying in their closets while over 300 million children around the world have never owned a pair of shoes."

And here is more information about this mission called Soles4Souls:
"Nashville-based Soles4Souls™ facilitates the donations of both new and used shoes, which are used to aid the hurting worldwide. Since its inception, Soles4Souls has distributed more than 3.5 million pairs (or one pair every 23 seconds) to people in 61 countries, including Honduras, Romania, Thailand, and the Sudan. The charity has been featured on CNN Headline News, NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams, ABC News, FOX, CBS, and hundreds of regional outlets around North America. Soles4Souls is a 501(c)(3) recognized by the IRS; donating parties are eligible for tax advantages. Visit www.giveshoes.org for more information."


Also, one lucky person who donates is going to get the amazing opportunity to deliver their shoes to a person in Mexico. I cannot even imagine how that could change a life (both of the recipient and the giver).

I Heart Bloggable Music and So Should You

Kat has this great idea of getting the word out about great music for the masses. So she started the bloggable music network. And here is my little itty bitty part, telling you about two of this month's featured artists. For more info about them go here.

One day back in high school I was walking from the yearbook lab to the main building with one of my fellow journalists (new fun fact about me, I was a yearbook geek...) and she was talking about music. We were both amateur writers and amateur singers, but when you're 16 or 17 and idealistic you think you can do anything. We had big plans. She asked me if I ever dreamed about being a professional singer. I QUICKLY answered no and brushed off any notion that I EVER had that dream. But I lied. Back in the deep, dark, no-one-else-dare-enter recesses of my mind, I entertained the dream of being a singer-songwriter.

At age 10 I wanted to be Twila Paris. Oh yes I did. I'm talking deep inside this armor, the warrior is a child, Twila Paris.(On a somewhat similar vein, my sister also entertained this dream. She wanted to be either Amy Grant or Madonna. Because they are so alike, you know). I think when I was 16 I probably would have liked to have been like one of the girls from Point of Grace (and I'm telling you right now, it hurt to type that, because, it is true. So sadly true. I'll be believing. I will be believing, oh, I'll be believing you.) In college I would have loved to have been Jennifer Knapp. Come on, I would still love to be her. She rocks. Kansas was stinkin' awesome and her song Romans is still in my top 25 most played songs on my iPod. Now in my oh so mature 30's, I wish I was Sara Groves. To write and sing such beautiful, thoughtful songs about life and faith would be awesome. She also dominates my top 25 most played list.

But I am really diggin' on two other artists right now, and in the record studio of my mind, I am so singing their songs on my new cd. JJ Heller and Joy Williams are two of my favorites right now. I remember Joy Williams when she was a cute blonde high school girl with a big voice and a big smile. I've been a music buyer for the little store that I work at for over seven years now and I remember my music rep gushing over her. How genuine she was, how talented and amazing she was. My sixteen year old self so would have wanted to be her at 16! She was amazing and adorable. But now, all grown up, she has come into her own and amazing doesn't even really begin to describe it. She still has the same gorgeous voice, but her sound is completely different, and in my opinion she's never sounded better. You really need to listen for yourself. If you go here you can download her new song Lose Myself for free! I cannot tell you how much this song has ministered to me. Honestly, it needs it's own post. I promise you will not be disappointed. While you're there be sure to check out some of the other snippets of songs, including my favorite, One of Those Days. SO. GOOD.

JJ Heller. Where have you been all my life? Seriously. When Kat posted about downloading JJ's album, Painted Red, for free, I was hooked. Hooked! JJ's voice is amazing, her lyrics are delightful, and her videos are awesome! Without sounding like a crazy stalker fan I'd just like to say if there was ever an artist I wish I could be bff's with, it would be JJ. Of course, I would make her sing all the time while I sit back and chill on the couch and what kind of friendship is that. Besides completely awesome for me, that is. Since downloading Painted Red I have also been to the iTunes store to download many, many more tunes, like Lover of Ashes (thanks Laura for that recommendation) and Small (for which I am forever grateful for the lyrics: I don't wanna make you small, I don't want to fit you in my pocket, uhhuh,a cross around my throat/ 'cause You are brighter than the sun/ you're closer than the tiny thoughts I have of you/ but I could never fathom you at all). JJ has a video blog, so if you want, you can be like me and pretend you are bff's with JJ too. If you're into pretend friendships. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

So, I'm not a professional singer-songwriter. But I still love music. And while I never got to be the next Twila or Jennifer Knapp, I can pass on the love of music here on the little ol' blog. And even though she can't hear me, JJ Heller has one awesome backup singer affectionately known as Kara with a K. A girl can dream.

Cultivating Praise

It's no secret around here that I am a complainer. If anything is more of my flesh than complaining I don't know what it is. Caedmon's Call had a cd come out a long time ago called Long Line of Leavers. Well, I come from a long line of complainers. Now I'm not one to blame my past for my present, but I've come to know that even still it's hard to overcome your raising. It just is.

I've been meditating on and putting into practice thanksgiving and praise. As God's word commands to do so in all circumstances and at all times. It goes against everything in my complaint prone nature. Goes against most all human nature, I suppose. Be thankful in the midst of crummy circumstances? Praise the Lord when you'd rather gripe someone out? Worship instead of whine?

I've found this most challenging in the mornings. See, I'm prone to headaches. Headaches of all kinds. Some are from sinus pressure, others are because of neck pain and tension, still the worst are migraines. I've dealt with them for more than 20 years and they don't get any easier. I wake up with headaches a lot. When the pain is so bad it wakes you up, you are not going to be in a good mood. I might wake up like this 2 or 3 times a week, sometimes less if I'm lucky.

This last week or so when I've been awakened by the horrible pain I've been reminded to praise God. I'm not saying I wake up with a bounce in my step, hands raised and Chris Tomlin songs flowing from my lips. I might lay there a few minutes, bemoaning the fact that I have another headache. I'll wince at the sunlight streaming from the window and I'll stumble to the bathroom searching for some Tylenol. But then I remember. In everything give thanks. And slowly, I start to worship. I thank God. I bring a sacrifice of praise. And though it may not be as difficult a circumstance as some go through, to praise Him when I feel so bad does cost me something. It is a sacrifice. But I'm learning that it's worth it.

I'm starting to complain less. I'm starting to see beyond what ails me to the world around me. I'm learning to rely more on God and his strength rather than my own. A girl with a pounding headache needs someone else's strength. I'm learning to praise throughout my day, and I find I'm praying more for others than for myself. I'm learning to thank God for the little things that before went unnoticed.

The sacrifice of praise is changing me. But above all, it's honoring Him. Because He is worthy. He is holy. And His sacrifice to save me far outweighs any I could ever offer. So I praise. Again and again and again. No matter what the day brings. Hallelujah!

You bet I am...

With all the flutter and joy of the christmas open house at work this weekend I couldn't resist this quiz. Behold...

You Are a Traditional Christmas Tree

For a good Christmas, you don't have to re-invent the wheel. You already have traditions, foods, and special things you bring out every year.

What Christmas Tree Are You?

Friday Fill-ins

I saw this over at my friend Kristen's new blog Dancing in the Margins and I thought it would be fun. I love a good meme. It's called Friday Fill-Ins.

1. My blueprint for success includes hope, coffee, and melody (or is that just a song lyric?)
2. Milky Way miniature was the last candy I ate.
3. The best facial moisturizer I've ever used is clinique (I just like to stick with what works).
4. Shopping can be good therapy.
5. I'd like to tell you about what happened at lunch today.
6. Loyalty is my strongest characteristic.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to sleeping in, tomorrow my plans include a movie and laundry and Sunday, I want to take a nap (for the 3rd Sunday in a row)!

Insert Blog Title Here...

I haven't posted anything since Tuesday! Who has missed me? (insert crickets chirping). It has been crazy busy with work this week (this weekend is our christmas open house and so it's a little nutty)so I haven't had a lot of time to blog. I have also tried to get up earlier in the morning and do my blogging then, but it hasn't worked out that way. My brain is too emptied out and fresh to come up with anything and then I get going on other projects. I've never been much of a morning person.

I wanted to share just a little thing that happened to me this week. We have a precious woman who used to work with us here at the store and she has been helping us get ready for the open house by coming in after her regular job to decorate (she is supercreative). I was sitting here at my desk working on normal everyday stuff when she brushed through and instantly the thought occurred to me to tell her how much we appreciated her helping us out. Seems like such a little thing, right? I hesitated for a moment, and then just said it. She had been a flurry of activity, but she stopped and turned around and looked at me. She had been truly blessed! She thanked me and asked me if I really meant it. Of course I did and I told her so. Just offering a little gratitude and encouragement blessed her socks off.

Encouragement. It's one of those little ministries that God has called all of us to do. We need to tell people when they are doing a good job, and express our thankfulness to them for who they are and how they bless us just by being them. Don't we all crave that? Being appreciated and loved and accepted and then having that be expressed in gratitude from someone else. Try it. You'll like it.

I'm also formulating a christmas music post in my head but I was going to wait just a little bit longer. I've been listening to Andrew Peterson's christmas cd for the last month, but last weekend is when I really pulled out my christmas music. There are some really good new christmas cd's that have come out this year and I feel the public must be informed. So stay tuned.

Hope

I read from Hebrews this morning and the portion that stood out to me on this day of all days was from chapter 6 verse 19, "We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure...". I came to work this morning to hear that my boss's son was let go along with 70 more of his fellow employees. Last week our small town paper headlines read of 250 workers being laid off at a factory which is a major employer in this community. Before that another factory let 50 employees go. Couple all of this with an election where the fight has seemingly never been more fierce and all I can say is we need a hope that is firm and secure more than ever.

I think of a precious woman on my praise team that has been fighting a brain tumor for two years now. She is in her fifties, never married, and left her teaching job this year because of the side effects of the tumor. She is a woman who has nothing but hope. In our small church we are standing with her, in prayer with our hope in a sovereign, miraculous God. There is hope for my sweet friend.

I think of Keith and Cheeto, with no home, no visible security to speak of, but there was such calm about him. He is happy with his dog and the new friends he has made around town, content in a tent and mended sleeping bag. For him there is a hope.

I think of all my inward struggles and battles, some that have swelled from molehills to mountains in my own mind. When I weigh them against some of the above mentioned hardships mine pale in comparison. Yet I complain, I fret, I doubt God's goodness and lack the trust in Him that brings blessing. I lament over my humanity and frailty and sinfulness and conceit. But there is a hope for me too.

Eight years ago my best friend and I sat on the edge of our seats watching the election results. It was her first presidential election to vote, and the first that I really cared about. We found our hope soaring one moment only to see it crash the next as the returns came in. Even though it was weeks before we knew who would actually win, that night was such a roller coaster ride, and I for one, did not enjoy it. I have no idea what will happen tonight (even if the polls seem to indicate pretty strongly who will win), but my heart is coming at it a little differently. You could say my perspective has changed. My hope is not in who is elected, but in my savior.

These are the scriptures I want to meditate on tonight and going forward in these unsure times. His hope is an anchor for our souls!

And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:5

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12

I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us. 2 Corinthians 1:10

To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. Colossians 1:27

Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Psalm 25:5

Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. Psalm 42:5-6a

Keith and Cheeto

His name is Keith. The homeless man I keep running into around town. His sweet-faced dog Cheeto has been his companion for the last two years. He told my co-worker Ina that he got Cheeto from a truck driver. The truck driver didn't want the dog anymore and when Keith said he would gladly take the dog the truck driver told him he wanted 10 dollars for him. 10 dollars for a dog he no longer wanted. Keith had no money but offered to shine the chrome on his truck and the truck driver obliged. Thus began a beautiful friendship.

I noticed today that Cheeto had a new leash. Keith tells me that a friend of his from the insurance place up the road bought it for him and also took the dog for his shots. He laughed as he recounted the story of the insurance woman's two tiny poodles and Cheeto, all in line getting their shots. Those tiny poodles were brave but poor Cheeto was the baby, whimpering when it was his turn to get his shots.

Keith is living less than a mile from my workplace, in a tent under some trees over by the railroad tracks. He and Cheeto have befriended the workers at the EZ shop and the little barbecue joint across from the tracks. They like to give Cheeto scraps and Keith cleans up around the outside to help them out. Today he did a little mechanic work and he finds other odd jobs around town too. He works at a grocery co-op, but not, he told us, when they have too many people around. I guess he doesn't like the crowds.

Ina and I shared our concern for him sleeping in the cold. He assured us he stays plenty warm but we aren't convinced. Winter is more than a month away and so are the below freezing temperatures. I know Keith won't go to a shelter, because he won't leave Cheeto behind. We have plans to get him a better sleeping bag, but, my Lord, it's just not enough.

A sleeping bag, some food, and the beginnings of friendship.

God is opening wide my heart to embrace Keith and Cheeto.

It's not much.

I know I can do more.

But it's a start.

Monday Manna

Here is my contribution to Monday Manna. Drop on by Exemplify to read more of what these wonderful ladies have to say about today's scripture, Galatians 5:22-23

I'm trying to write a deep,beautiful, thought-provoking post about this all-important fruit of the spirit and all that is running through my head is a song that my mom used to play in children's church when she was the director. The fruit of the spirit's not a cherry, the fruit of the spirit's not a cherry, the fruit of the spirit's not a cherry...but the fruit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-contro-o-ol, love joy peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. The song continued with various fruits and the list of the real fruit of the spirit. It was silly, but I bet there isn't a child that was in her program that didn't learn the fruit of the spirit that way.

This morning that song is not lost on me because I realize that even as adults, supposedly mature in the faith, we need to be reminded what the fruit is and what it isn't. First of all it isn't something we can work for, create or produce in and of ourselves. It is a by-product of The Holy Spirit working in our lives. When I realized this fundamental truth it was truly liberating. I had tried and couldn't muster much joy or peace and forget about patience and self-control. The by-product of me working in my life? The fruit is definitely the rotting variety: selfishness, worry, anger, resentment, jealousy, negativity. Try selling that at a fruit stand. I'm dishing it out, but nobody's buying it.

Another thing to know about the fruit of the spirit is simply found in the grammar. It is the fruit, not the fruits. They all come in one bundled up spirit produced juicy fruit. When the Holy Spirit is in control of our lives producing his fruit you will see love and joy and peace and patience and kindness and goodness and faithfulness and gentleness and self-control. It's truly amazing when you ponder it. Just have love or peace or kindness is wonderful, but that all 9-in-1 of these character traits of Jesus coming out of our Spirit-surrendered lives is awe-inspiring and humbling.

I desperately want this fruit to come out of my life. And I know that it can and will when the Holy Spirit is in control of my life. I like how the Amplified expounds upon this in Galatians 5:22 "But the fruit of the [Holy] Spirit [the work which His presence within accomplishes]..." I must have His presence actively at work in me. Earlier in Galatians 5 Paul exhorts us to live by the Spirit so that we will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature (v.16). It's the only way to experience His fruit. Live by the Spirit. I've found this is a daily choice, just as much as taking up my cross and following Christ and offering my body as a living sacrifice holy and pleasing to God are daily choices. There is in all of these a laying down of myself, a submission to the power and control of the Holy Spirit.

Does it come easy? This submission, dying, giving up of ourselves. If it is, I haven't gotten to that point yet. But as I keep going on this journey, I am learning it is so worth it. Press on. Submit. There is precious fruit to be had.

Weekend Recap

I have had one of the best weekends. There was nothing special about it really, but looking back from my Sunday night viewpoint, I can say it was truly wonderful. Maybe it was the extra hour of sleep.

I watched clips of Disney's Halloween Treat and Ichabod Crane on youtube on Friday night (it's okay, I know I'm a dork). That and a couple of dark chocolate covered marshmallow pumpkins were about the extent of my Halloween excitement. Oh, and I wore my It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown t-shirt. I'm nothing if not festive. When it gets closer to Christmas, like in a week or so, I'll have to break out Mickey's Christmas Carol. Another favorite from childhood that youtube is able to bring back to life.

Saturday was a take it easy day, my favorite kind. I did a little shopping (and got a pickle) and tried my hand at making chili for the first time ever. It was really good, if I do say so myself. And Oklahoma State won their football game, so that's good. We play Texas Tech next week and I think it would be amazing if we could win that one. My dad says it's the only way to keep all four of the big twelve teams that are currently in the Top ten in the top ten. I think he may have ulterior motives for wanting OSU to win though. You know, considering they are his favorite team and all. We have it all planned out. OSU beats Tech, then Tech beats OU in a couple of weeks, and then lo and behold OSU beats OU at the end of the month. That way Texas only loses one game, Tech only loses one game, OSU only loses one game and OU loses three. Seems like a good idea to dad, at least (that man's disdain for OU goes deep). We can dream, right?

I had lunch today with my best friend Rachel and my good friend Anna. Good times with the girls. Rachel's husband Patrick stayed home with their daughter who was running a fever, and Anna and I are single girls, so it was just the three of us. We went to this buffet place that has the best home style comfort food this side of Paula Deen's Lady and Son's restaurant (so I've heard). We're talking fried chicken, roast beef, turkey and dressing, cream corn, fried okra, mashed potatoes, squash casserole and this amazing dessert that they just call fantastic dessert. It needs no other description. We laughed and ate and talked about deep serious things like the presidential election, abortion, why marriage is so hard, submission, if it's more difficult to be a wife or a mother (the wife and mother at the table voted hands down that being a wife is harder, so I'll take her word for it). And at one point we got a good laugh about a certain ex's impregnated wiccan girlfriend. Just try saying impregnated wiccan girlfriend without laughing. I'm not even going to tell you what they are planning to name their little wiccan peanut. Nope. Not gonna do it. Our talk took a serious turn into the subject of regrets and the grace of God. You gotta love redemption and mercy with a side of fried okra.

I don't know about you but I'd really like to advocate for three day weekends, just so wonderful weekends like this don't have to be over quite so soon.

Don't Lose Heart

A couple weeks ago in my sunday school class the teacher had us go around the classroom and share what we thought each others' strengths or spiritual gifts were. The object was two-fold, to see ourselves through someone elses eyes (because often we are too critical of ourselves to be objective) and to give encouragment to other people. We were instructed to only focus on strengths, not on weaknesses.

I always get a little uncomfortable with these sort of exercises. Contrary to what blogging might appear to be, I don't like the spotlight or attention very much. That's more my sister's arena. I also don't like people to give me "praise" or compliments in a forced way. If anything, if I am recognized for anything praiseworthy, I'd rather it come from a place of sincerity than be said at all. I try to be that way myself.
When it came to my turn there was a slight pause (surely for dramatic effect) so I dryly stated, "Don't all jump in at once." At which they did, one by one. I listened politely and then the teacher spoke up.

"I think you have a spirit of tenacity."

"You mean I'm stubborn," I said with a chuckle that hinted every so slightly at the embarassment I felt over being in that pesky old spotlight.

"No," she asserted. "We're talking about strengths here. Tenacity is a better word." I knew what she meant, and thankfully we moved on.

Truth is I am quite stubborn. Sometimes it manifests with quiet resolve, the I shall not be moved kind of resolve. Other times I show off my stubborn streak with a foot-stomping, arms folded, stern faced NO! Not too long ago my sister and I were talking about this. She told me it wasn't necessarily that I said no so often (although I do and it does bother her), it's the way I say it. I guess I just want to get my point across. Firmly.

This week while reading 2 Corinthians 4 I was reminded of my teacher's words of affirmation. In this chapter Paul exhorts the Corinthian church to not lose heart. He encourages them by telling them about his own tenacity for the sake of the gospel, and for their sake as well. He had a confidence and endurance that comes from knowing who you are in Christ and what you've been called to do. For Paul, that was preaching the gospel, planting churches and ministering, first to the Jews, then to the Gentiles. He was convinced to keep on this path, despite persecution, suffering, and harships of all kinds. That is some serious tenacity.

I had to refer to Webster's dictionary for a definition of tenacious, just to get an idea of this "gift" I have, one that Paul most certainly possessed. It means Holding fast, or inclined to hold fast; inclined to retain what is in possession; as, men tenacious of their just rights. 2. Apt to retain; retentive; as, a tenacious memory. I also like the American Heritage Dictionary definition, which in addition to holding fast means clinging to another object or surface.

We need to have a spirit of tenacity for the times in which we live. People all around us are losing heart. We have a shaky, all but collapsed financial system, and a confusing, disheartening presidential election. I read about churches closing their doors for good, and pastor's leaving the ministry by the droves. We have massive poverty issues around the globe, the AIDS crisis, cancer, a climate crisis, on and on and on I could go. You get the point. The world is in a sorry state and I don't blame anyone for being tempted to give up, let go, lose heart. But we do have another solution...

Don't lose heart. To be tenacious means to cling to something. Cling to the cross. Cling to God almighty, sovereign and good and merciful. What's more he is holding onto us.

"The Lord directs the steps of the godly.He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall,for the Lord holds them by the hand." Psalm 37:23-24 NLT

I cling to you;your strong right hand holds me securely. Psalm 63:8 NLT

Cling to your faith in Christ, and keep your conscience clear. For some people have deliberately violated their consciences; as a result, their faith has been shipwrecked. I Timothy 1:19

Remember He never lets go!